Wednesday 24 November 2010

We kitties know which species is the most intelligent on this planet (clue: not humits or goggies...)

Problem solving kitty at work...

What a day yesterday was...it was going to be a normal quite day, you know one of those when I'm simply trying to convince one of my humits to provide me with more nutrition than the normal portions when out of the blue humit2 got really annoyed with something she read...To be honest I don't think I've ever seen my humit having steam coming out from both ears so what she was reading must had being really bad news...
What she was reading was an article about how some silly humits did some sort of research and they found out that goggies have evolved a bigger brain because they are more social than kitties (yeah right!) while the brains of more solitary mammals such as cats, deer and rhino, grew much more slowly during the same period. According to that research we are not therefore as clever as dogs because '...dogs are quite good at solving problems, which gives credence to the traditional image of the cunning fox which is a member of the same family. Dogs descended from wolves which appear to have the biggest brains as they live in large family groups...' (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/family/pets/8151924/Dogs-are-smarter-than-cats.html).
Of course this is just a lot of rubbish and silly humit talk since everybody with a bit of intelligence knows that brain size doesn't really predict intelligence in a species...take a good example here, the humits themselves, they have quite big brains in proportion to their body size and who are the only species that they actually believe in their own superiority and cleverness...everybody else on this planet knows that humits are not that clever after all...a good look through history would tell you why...they are the only species that have managed to destroy the entire ecosystem of their own planet and even to destroy many of their own species members through wars and conflicts over silly and unimportant matters like ownership of land that was never theirs in the first place...(belongs to the the planet sillies, you only live here for a short period and you don't own anything not even your own bodies...as wormies and other microbes are having it after you've long gone), issues about silly humit religions and beliefs...along with other selfish and really unimportant matters...not that clever those humits after all...
As for us, well, we are the intelligent species here as we have humit servants who have trained them after years of domestication to look after us, we do what we want to and we can live our own lives without having a lot to worry about...besides we have allowed humits to take us into their homes and allow them to treat us in some cases as equal to them (I know, a bit degrading at times...) as nobody really wants to live in the wild these days and to have to hunt for food and look for shelter when silly humits can easily provide all these..Besides our brains are big enough when you compare them with what little goggies have in their place on their heads... and in the right proportion with our bodies...any bigger and we wouldn't have being able to move properly and to catch prey, with a very big head and brain...silly!
Also as my humit pointed out '...other studies have also often suggested quite the opposed ....that cats are not only very intelligent but actually having an IQ which is only being surpassed only monkeys and chimps (and humits I'd have added her myself!). Cats can think and adapt to changing circumstances and they can easily learn by observation, imitation, and trial and error (wrong humit...us kitties don't make errors...that's a humit term, we kitties never use it!) and some studies seem to have shown that cats have been shown to exhibit greater problem solving abilities than dogs and that a cat's recall can last as long as 16 hours, exceeding even that of monkeys and orangutans....the anatomy of brain of cat is very similar to the human brain, whereas the anatomy of brain of a dog is not very similar to that of a human brain. Both cats and human beings have same regions for emotion in their brain. The brain of an adult cat weighs about one percent of its body weight while the brain of an adult human being weighs about two percent of its body weight. The brain weight to body weight ratio in cats is greater in cats as compared to dogs (see long comment at:  http://www.telegraph.co.uk/family/pets/8151921/Dogs-are-smarter-than-cats-feline-friends-disagree.html)
With other words...yes we are a lot more intelligent than dogs...and these silly humits that said otherwise need to have their own brains examined as their own brains don't seem to be working as well as ours...Meoow...humit feed me nooow...I'm hungry!

Tuesday 16 November 2010

Being the alpha cat in the house...

Just holding the stairs for you humit you can come downstairs now...it's safe!  

Sometimes it seems that I'm being accused for no apparent reason, simply for just is expected from me in the first place...for example I often find myself being accused by my humits of all peoplez of bullying the other two...shhish kitties who share the same environment as me and who eat most of the food that either way would have come my way anyway...shishh...pests I say!
Of course this is not true...I do not really bully anybody...kitties or humits...I'm simply looking after them, whether they like it or not! You see everybody needs somebody to look after them... for example to check anything new that comes into our home and to make certain that there are no threats involved, funny smells and flavours that is...You see humits are not really good at looking themselves properly...They tend bring home new things without a lot of thought or without properly checking them, they even allow strange other humits coming inside without actually thinking whether it is a good idea or not....and even worse they even let those other two to do whatever they want with no restrictions whatsoever, to eat a lot of my food and to use my litter boxes! Disgraceful...it is a miracle that humits in general can manage survive on their own in the wild...I guess this is why we are so important to them because they really needs us...Humits you see, need some control in their lives and this is why I'm so important and useful to them... because I tend to keep everything in order and humits in control...You see they need me to remind them when in the morning they need to get up...as they don't ever listen to their own alarm as they usually turn it off and go back to sleep...while I'm there to meow constantly till they get up...they also need to be reminded when to clean my litter boxes...again I need to meow after I've used it so they can clean it properly...to my own purrsonal standards. They also need to be reminded when it is time to feed me...so I'm always around when they are in the kitchen so they won't forget to feed me...three times a day isn't a good or practical idea for pussykitties like me who needs more frequent refilling of their food bowl than other kitties...especially those two that eat my food in my home. Of course they also need to be reminded when they have to entertain me...any time in the day or night when I'm bored and of course it is important that they do keep me entertained even if they are appear to be busy...they usually aren't...they just think they are...
So you see they really need me to be around and in charge of everything in the house, even to taste at sometimes what they eat so to make sure that they are not eating anything that they aren't supposed to...Being the alpha purrson in their day to day lives it is important especially for humits who otherwise wouldn't have being able to function properly...like my own and yours I'm sure!

Monday 1 November 2010

Humits can be sooo silly at times....or...there are not enough kitties to educate them!

What it's supposed to do again humit?
  
Sometimes the things I hear or see on humits TV thingi really make me angry and very sad...it's really so sad that there are a lot of humits who treat their kitties friends and all other non humit but friendly species out there with cruelty like they are not creatures with feelings and their own thoughts and perhaps different awareness of their world around them...You know something humits you aren't the only species which can do intelligent thinking...the rest of the natural world can too you know....and even, at least some species, solve some of the most difficult problems you huminity kind can't...But I don't want to mention today how ignorant and silly some humits really are but simply to point out at some cases in which a bit of knowledge and education could easily have saved some kitties' lives...I mean , come on humits, you can't really allow little kitties to roam in your streets where cars and probably other humits can easily harm them...you see kitties are like your own little ones...kids or 2 legged kitties, wherever you prefer, it's all the same...they don't know much about your real world and most importantly about the dangers out there...they have no sense of fear or danger when cars are passing...or some humits want to pick them up and take them away from their homes...they are not aware that not all humits are nice or kind to all creatures...some humits are really cruel and mean. Especially those kitties that they have left their mommy and brosses and sisses at a very early age and therefore they haven't yet learned everything there is to know about their world around them...there is their humits responsibility then to teach them about the world around them before they are allowed if they will be allowed to go outside on their own. A few months old kitten doesn't understand that you can't cross a humit road when there is car coming and if that car doesn't see the kitty...well...it is sad news all way round...My humits thing that humit cities and busy villages are not places for kitties that have learned to trust humits or that they are used to an easy life indoors...especially when the kitties live close by to busy roads...As for me I like it indoors...I've never tried to ventured outside and when I put a paw or two outside I quickly went back inside again to my own and trusted home environment...really I don't want to go outside...I've got my humits who are serving me well, two other silly kitties which I keep for bullying and lots lots of toys, good views to the birdies outside to the garden...and even better snoozing places...don't need anything else...really...purrrs for now!


Friday 15 October 2010

Humans and their toys choices....

Human bad choice of toys...not moving!

I know humits try their best to keep us happy and entertained along with making sure of course that we are healthy and well fed...(food? I shouldn't have mentioned food..now I feel peckish again...maybe I should go and check if humit has gone to the kitchen...no, no it can wait till I finish...not that hungry...I think..did humit said ham?).
Anyway away from nice ham thoughts, unfortunately when it comes to humits deciding and getting toys that they think will entertain us, their choices can be so bad...really really bad. I mean they do buy things that they believe they will amuse us and entertains without actually putting any real thought, without thinking of what we kitties really like...They think they know us too well, which it might be true when it comes to feeding and providing nice cosy areas for snoozing but when it comes to entertainment area they are acting like they have no clue whatsoever...Toys that they don't move, no matter how nice they smell they are definitely not the best thing to get. I mean when humit buys a fluffy toy looking similar to a mousie which supposedly has some catnip on it (humits trust me here when I'm telling you that really there is no trace of catnip on that mousie shaped thingi you got us, you've being tricked by another having no clue humit....) and then places it in front of you..humit expects some form of great reaction from you. He/she expects you to get animated and to act all excited like they got you are a real mousie...well it ain't gonna happen...if they want us to get excited then they should get us a real mousie that actually moves and we can catch it and...play with it...(this is why they shouldn't get upset when kitties that go outside bring real mousies to their homes...they want something to play with when indoors...you see, he, he!).
I mean why a kitty should show interest in something made from plastic that it doesn't move or smells like a real mousie or birdie...All humits gadgets are doing something...why our toys should not be the same...As for the toys that they are hanging from a string...again the same principle applies here...they don't smell anything like the real thing or humits can make them move like a real prey...instead they should put a real mousie or birdie on a string and then let us try to catch it...that would be more fun...good entertainment, I sayz.
Those humits, I despair!...Sometimes they can be so clueless despite all our efforts to educate them...nevertheless they do provide a service when it comes to feeding times and cleaning litter tray...if only they could be trained to provide us with the right entertainment....
Oh my humit is back with a new toy...I wonder...Oh I like that brand new box...perfect size for me!



Friday 17 September 2010

Sometimes I get excited so what?

Having a bit of fun isn't a crime you know!


Well sometimes humits really worry me...I mean the way they react in situations. You think you know them and then all of the sudden they become unpredictable...humits can be such a headache at times, it's sooo true! They can also be so contradicting at times..they will tell you to do something and then the next day they will tell you off because you are doing the exact same thing they told you to do the previous day. No wonder, why they need and have so many doctors for their brains...they are not working properly all the time...this is why...kinda scary though if you think that they are actually looking after us...it's also explains why they are so many other humits that help humits who look after us to understand us...their soooo unreliable brain is incapable of comprehending the complexity of our actions and thoughts....poor humits!
Anyway back to my story...as I was saying for months my humits were keep pestering me to do some exercise because they see my big and thick fur as extra weight and they think that I'm overweight....(see what I mean? Their brain is not working properly...good example is my case of invisible fat...(really now...what can a big boned with lotz of fur kitty can do to convince her humits that she is not fat?). Nevertheless to keep them happy I've decided to do a little bit of exercise on my own...especially since I found a new and interesting toy in the house...what they call bubble wrapping...it was so much fun...running around with it ...diving in and making all this lovely crunching noisiez and spreading it all over the house...seriously I had so much fun the other day...it was the best toy and game ever...OK maybe I overdone it a bit with the chasing and running and got a bit out of breath but that was not reason for humits to take away my toy and hide it...I was having fun and was doing a lot of exercise as they want me to....and also I refuse and dispute all these accusations of making a mess and causing a hazard on the staircase with all the bubble wrapping trailing from the steps...that's nonsense! Also it was nonsense that I've got overexcited and humit had to use calming drops or something so my breathing would slow down....maybe I was a bit excited but that was because I was perhaps a bit weak due to the smaller portions that they are giving me to lose all that non-existent fat...really now...those humits so strange at times...oh well I guess I should know by now all these mood swings that they are keep having and therefore I should be more tolerant with their behaviour...shouldn't complain I guess they are not always know what they are doing and they are trying to please me most of the times...by the way that new box they gave me is unacceptable...not the right size..too small and the crunchy paper not that crunchy...really you need to try harder now humits!!

Friday 27 August 2010

You can't let food get wasted, can you now?

See? Food about to get wasted without my help!  
I'm a very,very considered kitty....not only I understand that my humits are only humits with their many faults which they can't control at times or they are even aware that they have, but I'm also very helpful at times. You see, I do understand that humits need what they call 'money' (don't know why really humits are making their lives too complicated and they need something else to use to get something else....too complicated and pointless in my opinion...) so they can buy me food, toys and shacks, etc and I know that they need quite a lot of money to do so and therefore they need to work to get that money (again don't get it why they don't just get my food direct instead of using an intermediate...humits so overestimated, when really they have no common sense at times!) so to help and to show my appreciation I will make sure that no food around gets wasted...I know one of the things that humits tend to moan about a lot is about waste...what we kitties apparently waste at home! The funny thing is that humits are OK with the things they waste...far too much food which they won't eat, far too many clothes, shoes, bags etc which they don't need or use all the time...etc.
So it is rather annoying though that humits accuse us that we are wasteful when we clearly don't need too many things like they do (or they think they do) as we have no need for clothes, shoes, accessories, toiletries and make up (and whatever they buy for us with exception of course of food, litter and the occasional toy or scratching area if they won't let us use what is free and available in the house that is...). So I try to help humits as much as I can by making sure that no kitty food is getting wasted and even in some cases some humit food too which clearly humits are about to waste...So all the accusations of me being greedy and eating others' food are not valid and they are only rumours spread by those who don't really like me (the other ones that live here and who don't like me because I'm the humits favourite quite clearly and right so). So to make it clear once and for all, I don't steal others' food, do not bully them so I can have their dinners and most definitely I don't eat all that food because I'm greedy or because I like food...I'm only doing it to help and support my humits...clear? Now I'm going downstairs to check if any of the other two has left...I meant wasted their food again...purrs and meows for now!



Friday 20 August 2010

When humits are busy...

Where are the humits when you need them?   

quite useful to have around at all times, especially when you succeed in training them to read your moods and even your body language so they know when it is dinner time without you having to tell them every single time...how boring! But there are humits though who are completely hopeless and of low intelligent as they can't seem to be able to master simple signs such as: 'I'm hungry now...feed now...not later'....but what can you do, you learn to live and cope with what you have got to work with....at least they can provide with a roof above your head and some food at times I guess!
In a sense I'm kinda lucky that my humits are pretty intelligent for humit standards that is, so I have no problems with communications...they have learned and adapted to all my needs and they always comply...Always except when they are busy that is because they are doing other things which they think they are more important than attending to my needs...I mean how work can be more important than my need to get attention and to play with when I'm in the mood for playing that is...How can they justify ignoring my demands for attention and play time and continue to do 'work' is beyond my intelligent thinking...really! Other than that I'm quite satisfy with my humits...I wonder though if there is some form of medication that the vet might be able to prescribe, since he was a cure for everything that it might help to get attention when humits seem preoccupied....hmmm...need to find out I thinkz!



Monday 16 August 2010

Not guilty...really

Trying to hide from shame and the other ginger pest!  

You know it's really easy to get blamed for things you haven't done...No matter how hard you can try to explain that you are innocent and everything was circumstantial...humits won't be believe you because they think they know everything...yes it can be frustrating trying to convince those stubborn humits that they are wrong and that they don't know everything after all...
You see I'm an indoor kitty...I've always being an indoor kitty and have never being outside other than the few dreadful occasions to that witch doctor, the torturer who humits call the vet...yeah right...I've got other names for him you know and none of them is that nice!
Anyway so yes I haven't being outside all my life and even with doors and windows open I still don't feel the urge to venture outside....I mean all these unfamiliar sounds, smells and constant noise...and even when it is hot it is a lot better inside and often I feel sorry for the kitties outside...especially Dora from next door who she sleep these days in a pile of old and dry garden weed and leaves...on the 'heap' as the humits call it...I mean that can't be comfortable and she always looks very keen to come inside and not so keen to go to her own home (with 2 other pesky kitties, 2 humits and a constant crying small thing that kinda looks like a small humit but it kind ain't...far too noise for starters..we can even hear in my home most days...very noisy...so noisy and annoying...can't blame Dora for not wanting to go home...).
So really I don't particularly want to go outside really but sometimes I get a bit curious, especially when I see my humits outside...if they are outside then it must be safe for a kitty like me to have a quick look...Apparently though humits don't think the same way (what's new here really...) so when they saw me outside this morning following them in the garden they freaked out big time...they thought that I was trying to escape or something..really now...I was only just sniffing and checking the world outside to make sure that it was safe for my humits to be outside on their own...and trying to figure out what is so special about going outside...not much really far too noisy and smelly as I was expected it to be which, on the other hand, doesn't explain really why humits are keen to go outside that often...
So in truth I was not at all interested in going outside, I was just looking...testing... so there was no reason for humits to get annoyed with me and to start checking for fleas and dirty paws and fur...paranoia...I was only outside for a few seconds...really now!
Well I've learned my lesson now...not going outside anymore...as outside makes you paranoid and crazy apparently looking at examples of humit behaviour...

Tuesday 3 August 2010

Holidays....grrr! (Part 2)

today...assisting humit with work!

Well I thought I carry on with my little explanation on why I really really hate humits' holidays as I've promised yesterday since holidays can be a very traumatic experience for us kitties and all other humit companions (those pesky dogs included too...grr!).
You see, the thing is that although I kinda understand (I thinkz) that perhaps humits because of the work they do outdoors (although my humits work indoors...they are indoors like me, he, he) they might need a little break now and then but what I don't really understand is why they need to go away and leave us with sometimes totally strangers or even in worse case scenarios to even strange, unfamiliar places....don't they know how stressful their holidays are to us? We are creatures of habit and comfort and anything that upsets our routine can cause permanent psychological and even physical damages...because no one can look after us properly than our humit servant or carer as they seem to prefer it (in their little minds that is...).
I mean take for example my own recent and very painful experience...humit1 has to go away for a week (on what she called a study week...yeah right...we all know too well what kind of a week that was really...) and she left me (and the other two of course but they don't really count as they didn't seem to care that much or take a lot of notice...) in the care of humit2...a humit who, we all know pretty well that he is not in reality capable of even looking after himself, let alone looking after three other very demanding and pampered kitties...well, the other two I meant they are very demanding and pampered...I purrsonally don't fall to that category as I'm well behaved and not at all demanding...yeah really!
The problem you see was not really that food was always late, not the right size, portion or even flavour...pate only served in the morning, fish in jelly is in the menu for afternoon and dinner...biscuits bowl should at all times kept full and water needs to be changed regularly and not once a day...and please do not let me start with the state of the litter trays...that humit is not one of the cleanest of his species it appears from his own toilet habits and I'm not gossiping here...really!
But when it comes to attention and play time he has so much to learn....he doesn't seem to understand the concept of 'meowww....give me attention right now' as well as humit1 and has no idea on how to rub a belly or scratch behind ears and under chins...and has the audacity to complain about scratches on his legs and knees when I sat on his lap...doesn't he know that I have claws and that I need to use them now and then?...dear me...what a humit...!
And these are just a few of the traumatic events that took place while humit1 was away...so you understand how pleased I was to see humit1 back again and everything going back to normal (although I had to play it hard to get for a while...for about an hour so humit1 knew that I was very annoyed with her). Hopefully no more holidays or away weeks for whatever reason are not in humits' agenda ever again because I'm going to be very very annoyed if Ihave to go through such a hell ever again....grrr I hate humit holidays!

Monday 2 August 2010

Holidays, grrrr! (Part 1)

choices....choices....

 
OK, there are a few things in life that I really hate (among other kitties in my turf, doggies, humit kiddies....too noisy for my liking....dinner not on time, small portions, etc....but we are not going to mention all of my little dislikes here, really!) but the one thing that really annoys me right now is this humit word that they are using far too enough this time of the year...holidays...I mean why humits really need holidays...us, kitties, do not considere going on holidays...ever...because we don't need to go on holidays, really, as everyday is a holiday for us...good food, entertainment and a lot of attention...what else a kitty needs? Well, the same should apply for humits then...they get good food all year around...get a lot of entertainment from different sources and they also get a lot of attention from us...and even in some cases they seem to complain that we do give them too much...see?
So why do they need to spoil everything by going on holiday then? Why do they need a break? We don't ask for a break away from our humits now, do we? Of course not as we do appreciate all the good things in life...humits included! So why humits have to go away for a whole week and leave us in the care of other humits who are not capable of looking us after properly? Even if humit2 is the one left behind to look after us, still things are not the same when humit1 is not around...our life changes for ever...(to be continued...tomorrow as I'm out of time right now)




Friday 4 June 2010

Summer thoughts


Not the coolest spot in the house....

I do like summer...don't get me wrong summer is a great season...nice weather, lots of birdies outside and even the humits tend to be nice and more...understanding when it comes to food and snacks...when they are in a good mood they will forget all about diet and excess weight and they will give you little treats when you play it cute and innocent...oh those humits they are so easy to work with sometimes...you just love them.
Anyway back to summer...as I said I do like it as a season, it is nice...long days, nice weather, etc but then you do get those extreme days which humits call heat wavez or something...when it does get too hot for a kitty like me who has a lot of fur and...a lot of fur...it's all fur not excess weight...I'm not falling to that old trap...
Then when it is too hot it becomes really difficult to try and find cold spots in the house...especially since humits are obsess with carpetz which are not only too hot to snooze in the summer (OK in the winter I guess when it is cold...maybe...) but also tend to pick a lot of kitty fur and humit hair too (I keep telling them that there is a lot of their hair there too but they think they know better and they believe differently). Then you have the humits complaining constantly (which at times becomes really boring and monotonous hearing them moaning about the dirty carpet and that they can never clean that CARPET properly because there is too much fur there...which half of it belongs to humits too...anyway, etc, etc...you fellow kitties probably know pretty well what I mean...). So if there was less carpet in the house...then there would have being more cool spots for me to snooze and rest in the summer and humits wouldn't have to do a lot of work and put that much effort in cleaning it...but oh no, humits think they know better and they cover the whole house in carpet... (which is not good enough for proper scratching either....).
Oh well, one day humits perhaps they will listen...till then I'm off to my cool spot in the kitchen for a little afternoon snooze...purrs and meows for now!

Wednesday 26 May 2010

After such a long time....

Searching for possible leftovers...


Well it has being a while since my last blog entry...didn't realise it...but you see I'm a really busy kitty with so many responsibilities...one of which is that I have to keep 2 humits in control as some times they can be really a pawfull...really such a hard work those humits...you always have to show them the right way to do things...I don't know how would they survive if I'm not around to keep them in control. I mean they can't go away on such a thing which they call 'holiday' because I won't be there to help them 24 hours a day...they wouldn't be able to cope on their own for a full week...they need to have me and the other two around 24 hours a day to feed, clean our litter trays, give me and the other too...their full attention 24 hours a day, to play with me when I'm bored, etc...otherwise their life will be meaningless...so you see humits do need us, kitties, to be around to help them cope with life and other unimportant things which don't include us...

But although I haven't being blogging all this time a lot of things have happened in the meantime...some quite interesting and other less important and worth wasting my precious time on recalling them...One of the most interesting things that took place was that ginger pest had tooth problems and was drooling like mad..(so funny...) and therefore humits had to take him to the vet (ha, ha...although I did worry for a while when I saw that dreaded basket coming out from the spare room... you never know who is in trouble till the humits turn their attention to you and start being really really nice...) where they removed his tooth (he, he...). If it was anybody else I might have felt a bit sorry for his condition...but not for that annoying loud and smelly pest...it was funny though...now we can call him toothless...although he doesn't seem to be suffering now..which is a petty...if anything he appears healthier and more annoying than before...grr...maybe humits can take him again to that vet humit and have some more teeth removed...whether they need removing or not...

Also Dora outside has being very naughty as she managed to catch a lot of fledglings (few blackbirds and the little robins that came out from the nest that was in our garden)...humits for a couple of days weren't very happy with her but they soon forgot all about the loss of those little innocent birdies and started justifying her behaviour on the grounds that she is a cat after all and that wasn't really her fault but the humits that let her outside all the time....

Oh well...humits...so unreliable...they can change their minds so easily...

What else happened...oh yeah...but I'm not going to mention it on today's blog entry...you'll have to wait till next time...meows and purrs for now!



Thursday 1 April 2010

Little writing before Easter


It has being a while since I've blogged but you know how things are when you are a very busy kitty like me....not enough hours in a day to snooze, eat, bully the others let alone write...Actually I have being very very busy helping my humit to complete her research (what a week that was....we all got headaches and pulled a lot of fur or hair out) as well helping her with other assignments and work...boy there have being a lot of enquiries about human-kitty issues...humans are getting worse by the day it seems. It must be really difficult for all these poor cats to have to live and cope with humits that behave in strange ways...I mean humits some times can be almost impossible to tolerate with all these mood swings they get and depression and work related stress...they become inhumit if you know what I mean and then they will blame everybody else...mainly us because in most cases we can't talk in humit tongue to explain how wrong they are...Anyway the fact remains that a lot of humits seem to have issues with many aspects of a kitty's life that they should already know how to deal with, for example, when a kitty is not using the litter tray because she has either to share it with others or because of cleaning issues or even because of location and texture issues...I mean I purrsonally hate the woody stuff because it gets stuck on my paws and fur and then humit complains that I look dirty and messy and in need of brushing...just the thought of that gave me the shivers now...brrr! Humits that live with kitties they should know they are very lucky and privileged because they are allowed to share the shame environment with us and they shouldn't make fuss when we are doing only what it is only natural to us...not using an inappropriate located, not cleaned properly or even smelly because of other kitty litter box...we are kitties with standards you know....anyway time to stop...I think I heard a humit in the kitchen...purrs for now!


Friday 26 February 2010

Being rather lazy recently....


Not snoozing and eating all day...I do a lot of reading too!

Today I thought that I should write something as recently I must admit I have being a bit lazy...I mean only when it comes to updating my blog entries...it's not that there are not things to write about...oh yeah there are plenty...a kitty's daily life is never boring despite general humit belief that we don't do much else than eat (a lot), groom (a lot) and snooze (a lot)....well not really, this is just a myth that you humits created and have sustained about us.

Yes I do like eating...you see you can't really say no to tuna and salmon treats but as I said before we eat less than humits and even dogs do..., yes we do groom a lot but this is only because we like to be clean and smell nice (and we do smell better than some humits and definitely a lot better than those silly dogs who they actually smell bad). Snoozing also is very important for us kitties so we can save energy for hunting and the possibility that we might need to escape from other predators (some silly dog perhaps...) and also and more importantly we don't snooze as much as humits think as we take more power naps than deep snooze and power naps are good for you anyway as humits keep saying.

But again humits seem to forget that we do other things too...for example we are most of the times there waiting for our humits when they come home feeling miserable and stressed so we can cheer them and help them feel a lot better...what else is better than seeing a cute furry face who looks so pleased to see you back (of course the fact that we are going to get fed as well it's totally irrelevant here...we are talking about the emotional support that we do offer in such occasions to the humits and not trying to look any deeper to the matter...end of story!). Do not forget that we also help you to relax and have some fun when we allow you to interact with us and entertain us by allowing you to play with us with those silly toys that you humits insist on buying for us and also that we always there to hear all your rumblings and moaning about other humits who don't seem to understand you or listen to you, etc, without ever complaining and always appearing to be really interested (although your discussions and monologues are often really boring and meaningless but of course you will never hear a kitty saying into her humit's face that she needs to get a life and stop moaning about how unfair life is...because that's life, unfair and cruel...get over it). Finally, for the time being, and most importantly we allow you to touch us to help you feel better, to pick us up and treat us like helpless humit babies and we even in some occasions we will touch you as well on our own accord just to make you feel better and to show you that we care....So as you see humits we do a lot more than just eat, groom and snooze and we don't even get paid for all our efforts (let's not forget here that we often bring home food for you too...) meoww!


Tuesday 16 February 2010

Diets and cats don't go together...


Not fat....just fluffed up... a lot!

There is so much bad press and publicity everywhere these days that unfortunately they can do a lot of damage and they can change a cat's life for the worse and damage their good relationships with their humats....I mean humats sometimes they seem to have far too much time on their hands and as a result they often come up with ideas and even worse solutions which are not for a kitty's best interest...

A good example is their current belief and understanding that us kitties can get really fat and become obese like themselves...I mean who ever heard such a preposterous idea...we DO NOT get fat (I repeat WE DO NOT GET FAT)...we simply just don't eat because food is there or because we are bored...these are silly only humat behaviours not behaviours that us, kitties, will implement under normal circumstances...

Listen once and for all humats, us, kitties, we'll eat only when we are hungry...most of the times little and often and just because some of us are naturally bigger than others (you know we simply are big boned and with a lots of furz) we will as a result look a lot bigger than others...you see our mass doesn't change, only the volume increases (and that volume is mainly fur) and therefore your scales are wrong...heavier doesn't necessarily mean fatter...just heavier bones or....err fur!

So yes fur is heavier than you think and therefore it is not our actually weight (or mass) that appears to increase...just a bit of extra fur...which of course means that as result there is no need for you to cut down on our daily food portions, treats and generally put us on a what you so called diet...diet is a human concept which doesn't apply to us...it's very similar to let's say having a vegetarian cat...he, he good one! Vegetarian cat! Ha, ha...sometimes I can be sooo funny...cat that doesn't eat meat or fish...not purrrsible...

Anyway and to get a bit more serious...so yes, cats don't get fat (of course as always there would be some exceptions to this rule...some kitties who are not well, mentally or physically, will get a bit overweight due mainly to situations and conditions beyond their own control...but these will be very very few cases and you can't draw conclusions from these very few cases that can apply to the general kitty population) therefore there is no need to put us, kitties, on a diet because you think that we overeat or that we are overweight...we are not.

So come on humat time to go back to normal, no need for dieting just normal big portions and treats again for me, a very poor, little and very hungry kitty...meooowww?


Friday 5 February 2010

When the same personalities collide


Stubborn, who me?

Yesterday I had a little argument with my favourite humat and as a result we both ended up being annoyed with each other. I'm not going to mention who's was at fault here and who was responsible for the little misunderstanding (after all we all make mistakes humats or kitties, don't we now?) but simply I want to mention that often when you are sharing the same personality with the person you live with this often can lead to a lot of problems...

You see, I strongly believe that us and our humats we are often sharing the same personality traits, which it is the reason why we are so compatible (serious talk here...the result of being the assistant of a professional humat) and we are forming such good relationships, relationships that humats sometimes they can't even have with other humats. This is why humats they like us, appreciate us and get so attached to us. Which, in general, is a good thing as it means that humats treats us as equals and even in some cases as better than equals (a little pampering doesn't hurt anyone especially us kitties).

The problem arises though when these similarities can lead to unpleasant situations, for example when both protagonists (whooa I didn't know that I know that word...who is a clever kitty then?) are sharing a trait that is not considered as a positive one...let's say for example that both are very very stubborn. This can only lead to trouble sometimes!

I'm well known for my stubbornness and determination something that my humat is also known for and which in some occasions has lead to rather unpleasant situations. After all accidents do happen and there is no reason to blame anyone for them...So when I make clear to the humat that I don't require any cleaning after a little accident I expect her to respect my wishes....but no, not my humat! Oh no, she has to clean me thoroughly without taking into consideration my own wishes...and in the end somebody ends up getting hurt and I, being told off...

If only she wasn't so bl***y stubborn....Oh well that was in the past and today things have got back to normal again (phewww)...as we both had to apologize to each other.

But situations like these often make you wonder...maybe it is not a good thing that we both are very similar but then again if she didn't understand me that well then perhaps I wouldn't have being the way I'm today (hmmm deep thinking here!). Well the important thing is that despite everything deep down she knows that I'm the one who is in charge at home anyway, not like the other humat who has not a clue or understands a lot about kitty psychology or behaviour...he is a typical humat you see, unfortunately...Anyway things are not really bad anyway if you think about it, even after our little arguments since humat apologizes with little treats and nice belly rubs...purrs for now!


Tuesday 26 January 2010

My cat duties


Working really hard....

Sometimes I really despair with my humat as she can be soooo unreasonable and out of touch with the reality...How on earth can she accuse me of being lazy when herself is as bad or even worse.

'You are neglecting your duties, Sheng Chi', she sayz....and she carries on...'you are not updating your blog as often as you used to...'.

Well she might have a little point here but there are a lot of reasons for not blogging often these days. You see she seems to forget that I spend a lot of time helping her with her work and study and that takes a lot of my time and patience at times...

I can hear you asking what do you actually do kitty? How can you actually help your humat? So I believe that this is the right time to answer all these questions and to make clear to those who are interested what my actual role of an assistant involves.

For starters I provide my humat with help and support, I'm always there for her when she needs me (and even when she doesn't) to purr and to allow her to cuddle me and pet me when she feels the need to alleviate her stress levels or when she needs to relax (this is a very important role, a role which all respectable kitties should be familiar with and they should always provide their humats with the necessary support...besides they do need us to help them cope with their own making but still stressful life).

Then it is my other also important role as an assistant; you see I'm helping her to find solutions to problems other humats have with their kitties....Yes do you believe it? How can anybody have problems with us? We are the perfect creatures for all the situations, we do not cause problems...how can we anyway, we are purrfect after all! And this is exactly the point that I'm trying to pass across to my humat when she has to advise other humats about their cat companions' behaviour. I'm trying to help and encourage her to think out of the box...it is not really the cat that is the problem but the humat that lives with her...humats often need to adapt to an environment where cats are living and often this transition can take some time or it doesn't go smoothly but as everybody knows, us, kitties we are patient creatures and we will allow our humats to take as long as it takes to adapt eventually to our way of life...

This is why my role as an assistant is really important, because I must help humat to help others so us kitties enjoy a happy environment with our humat servants...Meowws for now!


Thursday 14 January 2010

After the snow...eventually melted


Waiting for spring to arrive!







It has being a while since I've written anything on this blog but I blame the weather for this lack of creativity...you see when it is cold I get a bit too lazy and my paws feel a bit too stiff for typing...besides humat was a bit busier than usual and as a result I couldn't use the laptop to write...yes I know excuses...but still..good ones!

Anyway back to the snow...this was the first time that I saw so much snow in a day and snow that refused to melt for days and days...whoaaa...I'm so glad that I don't really live in a country where people and kitties get snowed in for days upon days or even months! Everything was white and very very cold...All birdies outside looked so fluffed and cold and hungry that I felt really really sorry for them and I wanted to bring them in but of course that wouldn't have being possible and I would have probably being misunderstood for my actions being a kitty, as we, kitties, supposedly hunt and catch birdies (although in reality I'm a more fishy kitty... I like my tuna more than my chicken flavoured sachet). At least my humats were very understanding and they were leaving a lot of food for the poor and cold birdies and as result we had many visiting our garden some that I had never seen before which it was nice and fun as I was trying to spot new ones.

But the matter of truth is that although I'm covered in lots of fur and even have fur under my paws (the humats call it tuft) which makes me suitable for such weather (yeah right) I don't really like snow and cold weather...as everybody moans about it, it is very cold and apparently treacherous and dangerous for humats when they are going out...I most definitely prefer nice weather, sunny and warm days when I can sit by the window sill and snooze under the nice and hot sun...yeah most definitely I like warm weather...plus I get bored with my humats complaining about the bad weather every single day and also being miserable and moody all the time...I really can't wait for the spring to arrive. Of course the worst part is when the weather gets too bad that humats can't go to shops to get my food and shops run out of cat food because they can't get supplies...I mean that is the worse case scenario for any kitten...it's like living in a disaster zone like in these movies we see on TV and DVDs....how can shops run out of cat food? Unheard of! They should have known better and they should have prepared themselves for such emergencies...I can't go half a day without my favourite tuna flavour sachets...Thank goodness that the snow has melted and everything is back to normal again otherwise I don't know what I would have done if I couldn't get my tuna treats...no, no, snow is bad...when spring is coming again?



Monday 4 January 2010

New Year's Thoughts


Time to get some well deserved attention from sleeping humat!!


As we are now well into New Year and new decade for that matter and things are going back to normal very slowly that is (humats, being humats they haven't removed Catmas decorations and tree yet...they keep say that it is not time yet....well I don't know what they mean as the poor tree is dying indoors and needs to be outside and to also stop all these pine needles falling on the carpet and then ending up on my own fur and then humats will moan again that my fur is all messy and needs brushing...grrr...getting annoyed now...it's all the humats fault anyway for bringing the damn thing indoors in the first place...trees should be stay outside in their natural environment!!!)

Anyway since it is a new year and a new beginning (according to silly in my opinion humat tradition) it's about time to make some new decisions and to decide how to improve this new year.

Of course having to put on that horrible anti-flea stuff on me it's not a great start to the year...I mean how I've ended up with those little critters...I don't go outside to be exposed to other creatures. I think it is the humats' fault in the first place, they brought them home on purpose...part of their cunning plan to groom me once again...I can see very clearly now what they are trying to do and is not working...I will go into hide and will only come out when they are asleep...Oh hmm! This might not actually work as I will need to come out more often for food and stuff...Damn my cunning plan is not going to work...Perhaps if they use all the stuff on the other two they won't have enough left for me...If I also play it very cute...maybe they will feel sorry for me and they won't put that stuff on me...What a start for the new year...apparently the last time that we needed that flea stuff was back in March...It is scary how the humat can find out that we have fleas when we don't really scratch that much to cause suspicion...I think humat might know us a bit too well...maybe she is not humat after all...I always thought that she was part cat too!

Anyway back to my resolutions (as humats called it) for this new year...well I don't really think that I have any bad habits anyway but nevertheless I will try to eat a bit less to please humat (of course that applies to only when she is watching...when she is preoccupied....well that is a different matter...if I'm hungry and there is food...there is nothing I can do....I'm a cat after all!). What else I should do for the new year...Oh yes I will demand more attention...I've already started being more demanding...I tend to jump on the bed early in the morning and making certain that both humats are awake (if not I will scratch exposed skin or put tail on face to tickle) so they give me enough attention before they get up...After all humat said that I had being a very good kitty all previous year and therefore I think I fully deserve a bit more attention this year! Meooow!