Wednesday, 11 January 2012

Being the youngest is not always that great…around humits that is!

I'm in charge around here...I'm in charge here!

Really I'm not anything like my humits! I don't moan that often you know like they do..I'm a very easy going kitty and often I forgive and forget....some (no smirking please, I’m meowing the truth you know!).  But sometimes, yeap, sometimes I'm not really happy with things…some things that is and I do feel this great urge to moan a little about it...You know when things are really getting you down!
As you probably already know (and if you don’t know shame on you…how can you not know such important things about me? Ha? Shame!) I’m the youngest of the three kitties in my home (humits don’t count cause they are by a long long way too old…far too old to count their ages really!) and of course I’m in charge of things around here (as it should be naturally) and even some might say that I’m a bit spoiled and too pampered (I wouldn’t go myself too far to say spoilt…just well looked after actually!).
Wherever! Nevertheless it is nice when I get my own way (which by the way is the right way) and things go smoothly as I like them to be….but sometimes there’s trouble in my paradise and this trouble results from the existence of the other two kitties in my house!
Take for example Ripley…which according to humits she is the oldest (blah blah….) so I’m supposed to be nice and hear this…respectful to her. I mean I don’t even know what respectful means anyway…as far as it concerns me, Ripley is another cat living in my house and therefore she should obey my own rules even if she is older than me (she was already living here when my humits brought me home as wee tiny kitty…so long ago!)…I can’t understand why humits think because she’s ‘older’ than me that she has to be the one in charge here and not me…unbelievable! Age has nothing to do with the capabilities (which meowself have) of a true leader like myself…I was born a leader don’t they know or understand that….therefore I must rule them all!
As for Choo Choo…grr that annoying ginger and white pest…what does it  really mean that he’s the only boy of us three and therefore he has special privileges and also that he’s again older than me…if I hear the word respect one more time muttered by humits I will meow very very loud….MEOOOOW!

I wish humits understood once and for all that age has nothing to do in my house domain with privileges and order of things….I’m in charge and nobody else…I’ll try all the food that is available. I’ll sleep on any place I like and I bother the other two if I feel like and I’ll check everything new…so there. Humits what do you say to all these then? Ha! What did you say humit? Oh my dinner is ready…about time too…the other two had theirs ages ago you know! Not fair!

Thursday, 5 January 2012

New Year's Resolutions and other humit nonsense...

Trying to show to humits that I don't need dieting...I fit purrfectly see?

Yeap it is this time of the year once again... a new year, new beginnings, blah, blah,etc, etc...all this humit nonsense that every year goes around just after catsmas....
And it's not that I care really...humits can do whatever they like and pleases them as long as it has nothing to do with my and my well established habits...especially those that involve my dinners and snacks...
You know this time of the year we have the same idea coming up again and again...especially since humits always feel guilty for eating too much over the festive know when they start mentioning that horrible word that I don't want to really mention know which one I grrr oh curses!
I mean what do they have to go through the same ritual every year? They know really that whatever they promise to do to change in the new year it's not going to work because after a couple of weeks they will fall back to their old routines and eating habits...humits are like us after all, creatures of habit...why are they wasting their time with silly resolutions and scare me too... grrr purrs & meows!
The worst thing of all is all these new year resolutions you hear and see supposedly made by kitties around the globe as well that seem to really annoy me! you think that kitties are that stupid to make like silly humits promises for change in the new year? Don't think so...kitties don't do CHANGE, when are you going to learn humits???
An here is a good example of what I mean with 10 kitty resolutions for the new year...yeah right!

1. I promise to trim down a little (not likely really...why should I bother? I'm purrfect the way I am...besides it's just fur not fat...we said that before!)

2. I'll be friendlier to strangers (I won't run away from newcomers right away but instead, I'll give them a chance to scratch my ears before disappearing under the bed...)
Really? I never disappear I stay hidden and'll never know they might have some cat food with them after all...and nobody touches me other than my humits...(I draw the line here!)

3. I'll be cuddlier to family members (I'll purr more and be more affectionate to everyone in the family, except the dog – unless he promises to stay the heck out of my litter tray!)...yeah right I'm already too cuddly...take it or leave it humits...and thank goodness we have no dog (what's a dog?)...unless the other two count as one...maybe they're 'dogz' after all, they do annoy me most of the time...

4. I'll be nicer to the birds and fish in household (Sure, I'll be very nice to them. Perhaps if I'm nice, they'd want to come out and play with me)...I'm always nice to other creatures (except Choo Choo and Ripley that is...never nice to them...grr annoying kitties...and I don't go out anyway don't want to!)

5. I won't be as finicky about my food (Just as long as it's the right texture, taste and temperature, and given at the right time each day)...I'm never fussy about my food...I'll eat everything I was given and find around the house..even humit food at times...the purrfect kitty here!

6. I'll lay off the furniture and stick to my scratching post (After all, that's what the scratching post is for. Besides, I've made enough marks to show who really owns this place)...yeah right...I rule this place therefore I can do whatever I like (if you don't believe me ask the humits around here...they say too that I rule this place!)

7. I'll stop hiding stuff behind the couch (It's getting a little cluttered behind there anyways. Someone in the house is really trying to find that diamond ring – they're making too much of a racket)....I never hide anything behind the sofa...I may occasionally drop biscuits so I can have something later to eat but never anything on purpose...the remote control always falls behind the sofa anyway without my assistance!

8. I'll let everyone else sleep later (I suppose 5 a.m. is a little too early to get everyone up to feed me. I think I can hold on until 5:30 a.m)...I'm good as long as food is around they can sleep as long as they doesn't bother me really but if they do forget to leave food for me then....well it's not really my fault now is it?

9. I'll stay off the counters, at least when company is around. (I only get chased off anyways. Sooner or later everyone leaves, so I can patrol the countertops if I'm just a little patient)...I never jump on the counters anyway...what's counters? Are the places in the kitchen I can't reach? Oh I can't get to them...they are far too high for my little legs...besides there's never food left there anyway...

10. I'll be more tolerant of those homemade bandannas (They feel a little funny, and I dislike having something put on me, but the colors really do match my hair coat, and they set off my eyes nicely)...ha, ha...that's funny! Yeah like humits will dare to put anything on me...ha, ha! They know I have claws and teeth...I don't wear anything than my fur...besides humits forever they try to remove stuff from me like my fur....grrr!

Ha, ha these resolutions were so silly...definitely not written by a kitty but by a silly humit who thinks he/she knows us kitties funny!

Happy New Year to all then..even to silly humits!